Thursday, June 10, 2010

**Do Not Watch Splice Under Any Circumstances**

★ ☆ ☆ ☆





**Spoiler Alert**


Ordinarily, I do my best to avoid spoilers. However, I think it would be a disservice in this case. Simply put, Splice is the most disgusting movie I have ever seen. It is the only movie that has ever made me feel physically ill. Inter-species sex? Really? I can't imagine why anyone would want to see that. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if there were redeeming qualities in the movie. There weren't. Sadly, the critics loved it. It was widely considered an intelligent exploration of the moral dimension of genetic engineering, and a parable for the difficulties of parenting. What rubbish. It had all the moral complexity that you would expect from a dinner table political discussion.

Splice is about a genetic experiment, which leads to the creation of a human/animal hybrid. The experiment began as an attempt to create a new medicinal compound, quickly spun out of control. In short, it is a diatribe against genetic engineering. While I'm sympathetic to this position, I was disappointed by the simplistic approach director Vincenzo Natali took to the issue. He aimed for a purely visceral reaction, which is exactly what he got. However, I'm not sure it actually caused anyone to think any deeper about the issue.

For a movie that has been praised for it's treatment of complex moral issues, the dialogue was surprisingly amateurish. The rushed conversations were filled with talking points, and flippant reversals. It felt like a made for tv movie, with slightly better special effects. While Adrian Brody wasn't terrible, Sarah Polley put in a performance unworthy of a b-movie. Instead of the suspense that it aimed to create, the film elicited little more than unintentional giggles, and a good deal of disgust from the audience. Guillermo del Toro should be embarrassed to have lent his name to such an amateurish production.

It seems that the entire purpose of Splice was to 'push the envelope.' Given that critics seem to mistake edginess for thoughtfulness, this was probably a good marketing ploy. Ironically, I wouldn't be surprised if this tactic was self defeating. After all, this project received $2.5 million from TeleFilm Canada, a Canadian Government funded cultural agency. Given the number of people who left the theatre in disgust, I wouldn't be surprised if there were calls to review Canadian film subsidies. Though I'm against most forms of censorship, it's hard to blame people for not wanting to fund films that they find incredibly offensive. If there is a market for inter-species sex scenes, film companies should be able to raise the money themselves. Somehow, I doubt that this market exists.

9 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Too late, I watched it last Sunday. I was grossed out by the inter-species sex part especially.

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  3. I'm not too easily offended, but the sex scene was sickening. The rape scene even more so. I honestly felt ill to my stomach.

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    1. THANK YOU SIR! I felt the EXACT same way... it was as if i myself had been violated, by simply having to be witness to such disgusting scenes... that movie needs to be taken down.

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  4. I wish I hadn't watched this movie. WTF were these people thinking? Sick bastards.

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  5. i unfortunately saw this film as well and will never get that disgusting scene out of my memory. these sick bastards should be arrested. never in my twenty three years of life have i been so ashamed of the human race as i was after watching this film

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  6. First of all, Fuck you, you simple-minded, republican, "christian" fuck. Secondly the movie was great, i mean the sex scene was alittle crazy but hey they made bank off everyone.

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    1. i couldnt agree more. the movie was an artistic masterpiece

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  7. The people that thought it was the most disgusting movies havent seen alot of movies. Watch a serbian film, child rape insest a lot of f***** up sh**, splice was not thatbad, it was like the species mov8es with a less hot chick, cannibal holocaust is even worse a lot of animal cruelty scenes are real, like the apocolypse now ox, that was hacked up and decapitated live on film,and for real so...besides real life is 1000 x worse than any movie bout some bull****, watch your brother get shot in thehead in front of u. How ppl freak out on such little sh** is amazing to me, but thats wut u git when rich suburbanites who are sheltered go to college and get an education. In caveman days u would have died out long ago, u should thank the society that cares about entertainment at all because really entertainment serves no purpose, so chill, get some life expierience, and STFU.

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